Pligh

The Joker in the Pack - an agent of chaos

2010-08-15T10:30:00.005+05:30

I watched the Dark Knight again recently, and as always, I love the way it ends. How Commisioner Gordon explains why the Batman has to be ‘The Dark Knight’. But this time around, my concentration was on another character.
It struck me about the characterization of the Joker. I am sure that reams have been written about him, and the amazing potrayal by the late heath ledger. We will probably never see him again, since Nolan has said that without Ledger, he wouldnt bring that character back. So, as a character, this is actually good. There wont be another chance to ruin it. I am a purist that way!

To be perfectly honest, the Joker cannot exist. As a story, a concept that had not been done before, its amazing. “Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order and everything becomes chaos.” (The Joker, Dark Knight)

One of the things that Nolan very rightly avoided was trying to put a background to a character like that. So while Batman has a past, and Harvey Dent builds a past during the movie, the Joker is really a one trick pony. He's the constant. He doesn’t evolve or change.
We dont know how he really became the way he was. He himself talks about his scar, but, as rightly done, in two different instances, with two differing stories. The only common is that his stories are more to evoke sympathy. How he was wronged. Which is quite funny, since he never really wants to fit in. He just wants to upset the order. He's an agent of chaos.
I think that's cool. That’s purely from a story point of view of course. Alfred points out the story of the bandit that just wanted to rob for the sake of robbing. Which is quite funny, actually. Most bandits do have a motivation, to rob for the money. In order to be motivated to do something purely for the heck of it, or to see the outcome, either you have to be an adrenaline junkie, a social scientist or somebody without any real goal in life.
The funny thing is that the I could see the Joker be all three! That’s what I think. The scientist bit is considering he likes to believe he can predict people’s actions which he does Except at the end when the people in the boat don’t react the way he expected. A consequence of another theory, about how individual action is different from collective action. The Hive Mind concept, Crowd psychology or Hari Seldon’s psychohistory.

The Joker’s motivation is purely his own pleasure. Which is all brilliant!
He creates situations where people have to make a choice. The whole movie, revolves around choice and the consequences of that choice. All characters are motivated to make a choice. The Joker on the other hand, never has to choose. He just does.
So its really interesting how if you really look at it, the Joker is actually not really somebody you can ever associate with. He’s not grey. He doesn’t have a good side. He’s just black (on the inside). With a white face. And red lips. And green hair. And black eyeliner. Wow, that’s scary! And so cool! (Story wise of course.)

Inception - Fiendishly Fantastic Film

2010-07-18T05:43:00.003+05:30

Wow, still reeling from a fanboy head rush!! Was looking forward to this for a while. This was a movie which had Christopher Nolan put aside a billion dollar batman franchise to make with material had in his head since the age of 16. Well, I am happy to say, this movie delivers. I am so happy, I wouldnt mind if Nolan found some more 'ideas' from within his head and made stuff like this without doing another Batman movie. With a Batman movie, there's a legend to live upto, a mythos to keep check on, but with something like Inception, Nolan has the liberty and, with his solid blockbuster reputation, the resources to do what he wants! I say, give the man, the money and creative freedom! Let him make more of such movies to entertain, and confound (to just the right extent!)

Coming back to the movie, well, its a double tap movie (to use a term from zombieland) - there's enough material in there to make it a two time watch!

It takes all the uber cool technical stuff that made Dark Knight an awesome movie, and added a story with quite some unique angles to the genres of heist (not so much taking as much as putting!), world-within-a-world (lego land with real blocks), dream/reality (life is more complicated in dreams, and dreams within dreams and well...), all-out-tension-building-action-thriller!!

Personally, I loved the zero-g setting the most. Its not really a new thing, having seen similar concepts in a lot of movies. But,take the conundrum of how to make people fall when there is nothing natural to make them fall! Brilliant! And zero gravity body transportation by stacking people together! How cool is that!

Point to note - I love the job profile of the extractor. You have to sleep on the job!!

Lots of layers in the story, and great characters. From the 'huh? Ken watanabe looks old' beginning to the 'huh? so is he...?" ending, this movie builds on a story which the Indian mobile service provider, Idea uses for its advertising. An idea can change your life! (yeesh, i know!) And also, dont play around with your subconscious, it can kill you!

Now, even though this movie has some top notch acting talent, but unlike the Dark Knight where Heath Ledger stole the show, this one is all about the overall package!

So its a movie worth watching!!

Baby Chronicles: Heading straight for you

2010-02-14T12:14:00.003+05:30

Life keeps changing whether we ask for it or not.

Things happen, even as we hold on to what we got.

Sometimes, change is hoped for, as things get worse

Other times, deviation from norm can seem like a curse

We choose our path sometimes on experience past

Sometimes it just happens and sometimes too fast

So, when faced with the headlights coming your way

Either move away from oncoming or stand and pray

Guess we chose the latter...

Baby Chronicles: Ten Months back...

2010-02-04T08:28:00.003+05:30

Wow... its musty in here! Guess nobody's been around for quite a while. This old blog is mostly reminiscent of the good ol days wen I was a carefree bachelor. Things have really changed over the past year and a half. Responsibilities have piled up and somehow I never got the time to write. Its been in the back of my head though that I should.

Speaking of responsibilities and procrastination, I'd been meaning to write about my (fresh, out of the oven about a month back!) daughter. There's a whole bunch of emotions having a party in my head and I seem to have gotten lost figuring out which one was my primary one.

This will probably be a series of posts.

I think when I initially found out, I was driving down the Rajiv Gandhi Salai towards Tidel Park; I was going to office. The wife (henceforth referred to as Leks) had been feeling a little odd about 'that time of the month' not really arriving on time. But, on that fateful day, I guess, I was more pre-occupied with the holiday we were planning. So, I told her not to worry and just in case, we went and got a pregnancy test to check. Leks was worried, so she bought two.

So, anyway, there I was driving down the road on a fateful May morning, little aware of the earth-shattering news coming my way, as my phone rang. It was Leks, and she delivered... i mean, told me the news. Car swerved a little. Auto driver who had been too close swerved and sweared. But, years of road experience (exactly 4) took over instinctively, as my mind left the building.

Like a stupid idiot, I asked her if she was sure. I guess, there's no real way to answer a question like that, other than maybe to say.. "I dont know! According to the legend, a double blue line means something's coming!" but she was nicer. She had tried both of them and they both said the same thing. "Congratulations! You are pregnant".

Having stopped reeling from the news, I swerved again, and the smart auto had already moved behind me thinking I was some newbie driver. I moved slowly to the left most lane and started my trip back home.

That was how those nine months began....

Nine months which filled with all sorts of experiences passed tumultously and then, on January 9th, 2010 at 1:00pm, she arrived.

The beginning. (as against The End)

WTF Prize of the year goes to...

2009-10-10T20:13:00.007+05:30

I cant detach myself from my actions, but can I detach myself from the action of people who make decisions which affect all of us? Is it also so, that these decision makers are put in this place, because, having years of experience and 'wisdom' over the years, are a better judge of what is the right thing to do?

So what happens if what they do.. happens to enter my WTF Moment of the Year! I mean, Obama wins the Nobel Peace Prize?? I think this definitely re-defines comparison of improbable circumstances. I mean, the dude is in office for a really short period of time, and does mostly stuff to save the US economy. Makes a couple of speeches about peace and nuclear disarmament. And voila! Nobel Peace Prize. Peace Prize???

What life changing and history altering stuff has he done yet? So, what has this committee done? In their post explaining why they selected Obama, the Nobel committee state that... "for his extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples. The Committee has attached special importance to Obama's vision of and work for a world without nuclear weapons."

Vision?? Lots of people have vision... some people even have visions (and not the future changing ones, but crazy out of this world visions). So what was extra-special about Obama? Was George W Bush so bad that the guy who came after him got a Nobel prize just for being a nicer guy?

Obama’s just got started. Why couldn’t they have waited a year or two, and given it to him after he got some results or actually made ifference.

The nominees for the peace prize had to be finalized by Feb 2009. So that means, our newest winner of the Peace prize was in office for about a couple of weeks before he was nominated for a lifetime achievement award. How awesome is that?

Well, I hope that they, in their 108 years of experience, got their choice right. I mean, who knows? We all diss them now and Obama actually does what he he’s been so eloquently speaking about. Then, these guys will look good, wouldn’t they?

So, is their collective wisdom really right?

The End of the World... Really? Not Again!

2009-09-24T00:36:00.002+05:30

So the world comes to an end in 2012. Not because Nostradamus said it, although I guess you can never say, coz nobody really knows what he said. This time, it’s because of a whole bunch of dead people. According to some "experts", it’s all over for humanity in 2012 because that’s what the Mayans said. Umm… hang on, but wasn’t it just that their calendar reset or something like that and not that they predicted the end of the world. But convenient, don’t you think? Scream ‘the end is nigh’ and point your finger at a civilization that sort of wound up tens of thousands of years ago and can’t be held accountable if it doesn’t end. Of course, when I say wound up, its not like they were some association or part of a company which shut shop because everybody knows you cant just walk out of a civilization. Or can you? Atleast some recent finds suggest that. These Mayans just got tired of being a civilization and walked off in the middle of lunch on a Monday afternoon. (Not sure about the meal and the hour, but wouldn’t that have been a good time to give it up?) I think it’s a great idea. I am pretty tired of this current civilization myself. Maybe I could get up and just go wild... Anyway, do you know what happened to these ultra ‘civilized’ Mayans? They gave up their ‘barbaric’ ways, found some cool Spanish conquistadors, and they all lived somewhat happily ever after. Makes for a great movie, no? Oh wait! Mel Gibson did that already.

I think it’s a great idea for a civilization to hit F5 after sometime. Humans are among the few species that accumulate history. It’s a good thing, is what I’ve been told. Like Newton said about standing on the shoulders of others and stuff, it seems our whole culture is built on what others did before. So there! We need to keep building on a vast knowledgebase of stuff that happened before so that we can survive today. That’s why people keep referring to times gone by as the “good old days”! Back then, there wasn’t so much to learn. And how old people keep saying my memory is not as good as it was. Of course it’s not, gramps! You never had to remember so much. So in the new-age world of civilization refresh, after a little while, we’ll just reset, and re-invent everything again. This would give so many people so much more opportunities to discover, invent and create again.

But then there is already some new age wisdom. One of the new-age belief systems is called Mayanism. See, we refreshed the Mayans! So, they’re back. But are they good this time around? Well, Mayanism’s basic premise is that the ancient Maya understood aspects of the human experience and human consciousness that remain poorly understood in modern Western culture! So, Mayanists will be, like, really deep, man! In addition, as a New Age belief system, Mayanism scorns academic scholarship, giving preference to knowledge gained through revelation and prophesy and to traditional knowledge. (or what is imagined to be traditional knowledge) Right on! Stuff it to the Stuffed Shirts! Do the voodoo!

And they say that Indians can’t let go of superstitions and primitive beliefs. It begs to be said that some time down the line, when these beliefs catch up with the urban crowd in cities, we’re all going to go to the villages and ‘unlearn’ our progressive belief system!

But it won’t come to that. The world will end in a spectacular disaster of epic proportions in 2012. Roland Emmerich, the new seer who has seen the end of the world in so many different ways (aliens, global warming, godzilla etc) now will oversee John Cusack and Amanda Peet trying to save some of us during this global catastrophe! So book your place now! Atleast you’ll get to see the movie in 2009… and remember, like it says in the movie poster, You were warned! (right here on my blog, ofcourse!)

Here we go again

2009-09-18T07:49:00.002+05:30

it happens everytime. I begin to write and then it petters out. There's no excuse I know but the mind is a weird thing. It gets excited, attempts to create, loses steam and then moves onto something else. So many times have I developed whole novels and movies in my head and then woosh... they disappear into nothingness... really, woosh! havent u had ideas that wooshed away? But mine, well, they dont just woosh and go away. They pop up at a later time just to fill me with a guilt and feeling of uselessness at not having done something about their earlier wooshing.

So here I am. Post my leap into marital bliss (light humor for the wife), I had cut down on my reading. So, it was quite refreshing to catch up on some as recently, I've had some free time (not doing much at work compared to couple of hectic months previously) on my hands. Using my free time constructively (not!), I have done lots of reading. Both official (boring) and unofficial. (ranging from "ho hum" to "oh so funny, snort, snort!") Mostly blogs and such, but I chanced upon some really humorous stuff. This really got to me. I felt the familiar urge to start again.

Its really not so much that I had topics to write on than the urge to just write something. I dont know if that counts as the proper reason to do something like that, but hey, any reason to get going is good enough.

So, here we go... again... may it rain... in spain... on the plain... down the drain... with a fervor to cause pain... umm.. woosh(ed by me)

U get the point.

Delhi - 6

2009-02-21T14:25:00.002+05:30

I just saw Delhi 6 and I wanted to put in some words regarding the movie from my point of view. I read the initial set of reviews, and as usual there are some who liked it and some who didnt. I dont have a totally polarized opinion of the movie. It was good in parts with the first half being very engaging, and humorous. The second half, works hard to tie in a lot of the disjoint first half, and bring itself to a rather eventful climax. But the underlying issue that leads to this climax is a little weak, almost forced just to get the story to the end. Ofcourse, the way the movie got stretched at the end was a little too much, and it seems the Bachchans come as a package deal - If you get one, you get another one free! The music is awesome, and you need to see the video of masakali to really appreciate the song. On the other hand, not really. The songs dont take aaway from the movie, and are part of the flow, which is cool. Technically, and dialogue wise, the movie is pretty good. Sonam Kapoor is really good, and Abhishek I guess has done an ok sort of role. I am still a little confused if he's actually like that in real life, because he sure doesnt sound like he had an American accent. It was more like an Indian trying to speak English with a fake accent, like Salman Khan. All the others have done a pretty good job. So overall, I recommend people to watch the movie for the first half, and most of the second half. Its a little preachy, and unfortunately it preaches an oft repeated communal message. But I guess a reminder never hurt any one. The only downside to the movie is the extended post climax section dragging itself to the end of the movie. I would recommend and say its a one time watch.

I want to be cool(ed)!

2008-09-29T08:38:00.003+05:30

When I was a small 'un, growing up in the desert plains of Saudi Arabia, I remember a time when the temperature in our area dropped to below zero degrees centigrade. I was really young at that time, and my memories are slightly vague. Mostly remember a blue sweater, and blue gloves and a huge wollen cap that pretty much drowned my head. Everybody kept saying its very cold, but somehow, I kept hoping that it would snow. It didnt, and all i ever got was the frost on the window.
After that, I moved to various places, Dubai, Kerala, Pune, and Chennai, but ofcourse none of these places had a remote chance of being snowed down. Ever. And as time progresses, I feel that my interest in seeing snow are melting like the ice caps in the Artic circle.
Its ofcourse one of those things in India, where when talk of overseas travel comes up, one of the common questions is with regard to snow. If u've seen snow, then u dismiss it lightly like its an everyday occurence. But for people who havent, its still a unique experience the first time around, and lots of photos later, u get accustomed to the fact that its probably not really a good thing especially for various modes of transportation.
I'm, ofcourse, still waiting for snow, and with every trip I take to UK, I always hope that this time there will be snow.
Well, I came pretty close the last time. The temperature dropped below 0 again and there was frost.
It had settled over most of the scenery in the morning, and sort of seemed like somebody had done a desaturate in photoshop on the landscape. The initial reaction was to go shutter crazy and snap a lot of pictures, but i thought i'd wait and see if maybe this time, there might be snow! And my hope as a kid, to see snow, had been rekindled again. But it turned out to be a false alarm. There never came snow. Well, atleast we'll always have had frost!
I am actually a cold person. No, not as in, I'll-walk-by-a-dead-body-and-act-like-i-see-it-everyday cold, but more like, i'd-rather-be-in-antartica-than-in-the-sahara-desert type cold person. I sweat like a whole herd of pigs in the presence of the slightest increase in temperature above 20 degrees celsius. Yes, I come with storage instructions - keep slightly refrigerated at all times! This usually amounts to my clothes being drenched with sweat when most people dont even break out into a sweat. On top of that, i've got a very mild case of Axillary Hyperhidrosis. Wat's that u ask? Well, this wouldnt be an informative blog if u didnt learn something everyday. That's medical gobbledygook for sweaty armpits!! This is obviously a point of consternation for me, especially since I am in the corporate world, and in the diabolically hot land of Chennai. Chennai is also temperature controlled - maintained at a low grill setting of 40 degrees throughout the year. So sweaty armpits, hot city... u get the picture! I reamin indoors whenever I can, because the moment i step outside, its like i took a bath in my clothes.
I recently drove down to Bangalore in my new car (separate post on that one) and everytime I go there, I never want to return. It takes me a couple of weeks of moping, and wishing before I return to appreciate the qualities of Chennai... which pretty much consist of 'Since I am here, I'll stay here. Besides, its a nice place if not for the heat' Yup, Bangalore, despite its growing traffic problems, is still an amazing town weatherwise. And women wise as well, but that's another story.
Anyways, no point in wishing, when I've got Chennai! I guess the best I can do is hope that due to rapid climatic changes caused due to some meteor hitting the earth in Russia, there will be some really cold weather in Chennai sometime... wishful thinking...

The Dark Knight... See it! Its worth it

2008-07-20T00:00:00.002+05:30

S, u see a movie, and you feel you need to tell people about it. To share the experience, and help others to share a similar experience... yep, not just misery, even having experiences love company. I saw the movie The Dark Knight today, and boy! Was it a doozie! Its not a family movie, mind you. But its a movie that deserves to be watched nonetheless. It balances fine film making (in the arty award winning sense) with summer blockbuster action. If ever there was a doubt, that films could not be both at the same time, TDK blows away that concept. Christopher Nolan, take a bow. You've made one of the finest movies I've seen in a while. Infact, I feel a sense of deja vu when I say that. I felt the same way when I saw Memento. The writer-director combo of Johnathan and Christopher Nolan come together to create yet another awesome movie.
If Heath Ledger had been around, he would have been happy to know, he created a legacy that would be remembered for a long time. His portrayal of the Joker has raised cinematic evil to new heights. A person with no plan, just a need to perform...
The story is gripping, the action is amazing (watch for the batpod as it runs up a wall and flips over like a martial arts move), and everybody does well. Ofcourse everybody except for the female lead. She unfortunately doesnt have much of a role. Infact, none of the women characters in this movie seem to be well developed (and I dont mean physically).
But yet, its an awesome movie. It motivated me to blog about it, just so that I remember I recommended people to watch it.

Where the hell is Matt?

2008-07-09T21:13:00.001+05:30

Another video which will warm your heart. And make u wonder why he dances like that!

Where the Hell is Matt? (2008) from Matthew Harding on Vimeo.

OMR tales

2008-06-07T12:20:00.004+05:30

Traffic in Chennai on the Old Mahabalipuram Road (OMR) has improved after they constructed the 6 lane highway, the IT highway or Rajiv Gandhi Salai as its known officially. Yet, there are choke points along the way, which as my friend Santosh points out, indicates bad planning. Most of these bottleneck areas are because of junctions where traffic needs to get on or get off this road. As usual, the road planners didn't have the foresight to plan for these exits, unlike most international highways. But yet, having such big roads is a big relief for people who have to drive up and down that road every day. But I hope I've not spoken too soon about the comforts, because there's a toll gate coming up and I expect that it the bad planning effect would rub off on that as well. Here's hoping these people understand the requirements of the users of the road, especially those who have to use it on a regular basis.

One of the things I had mentioned in a post long time back was about the lack of driving skills. It's not as such a lack of driving skills, but more a disregard for road etiquette. Unfortunately, on the OMR, the only thing that works is every man for himself. Everybody, especially the buses and the taxis, drive like the road is theirs and everybody else should get out of their way. I fail to understand why they have to cut across from either side, brake quickly, and then have the audacity to blame you for not driving fast enough. Sometimes, I get the urge to just remain in front of one of these guys, bearing his constant flashing of his high beam and repeated honking, just to annoy him for a change. But it doesn't do any good to anyone.

The main problem with the lack of road etiquette besides the annoyance is the danger of accidents. There's so many of them happening on this road now that the police had planned to be more vigilant. But the people who drive rashly continue to do so. It's really irritating that these taxi drivers not only endanger themselves but also the people sitting along with them because of their recklessness.

Equally annoying recently was some VIP who decided to go through this road during peak hours, when there's bumper to bumper traffic at some of the bottleneck areas. There was a convoy of 4 cars, all large ones, which honked and flashed, and generally annoyed people in general, trying to get past the traffic blocks by moving traffic aside. What right does he have to do that? In fact, I think it's a good idea he has security. I doubt if any terrorist was interested in him, but if I got the chance, I'd have liked to give him a dose. That's probably it. He needs Z+ security for protection from the common people. The ones who elected him in the first place.

Another point to note is that he had four cars. Imagine if every politician or person in power used it to have his own entourage. The amount of fuel being wasted for his joyride. It's distressing that in a time when the common man is being taxed by skyrocketing fuel prices, there is such rampant wastefulness.

My first RAW (Really Arbitary Writing) post

2008-06-05T15:20:00.001+05:30

Sometimes, I get this urge to write. Just pen down some words which might or might not mean anything. Its not a urge, its a need almost. I dont understand it, but I am usually too lazy or too busy with something else to actually go through with it. The other problem is that most of my thoughts are pretty disorganised, and then having to organize them, and write properly becomes a chore. Why cant we write unbridled, un-spell-checked, and free from the needs of strict decorum. If we can use words we think of, and dont have to worry whether the context is right. If sometimes, we can write exactly how we think. Because in our heads, we dont have grammar, we dont have proper syntax. Atleast not in my head! So, for a change, I decided to put in a post exactly how it came out of my head. These are the words I'm thinking and typing at the same time. Ya, I am a little fast in the typing department, so I can type and cover most of my thoughts and then think some more. <pause to think>
I go read others blogs and I find them so well made, so properly done, and I think, so much effort. But then I see the readership in their blogs, and compare that with mine, and I see why. I guess, it really requires some amount of skill to be a good writer as opposed to just wanting to write because u can. Big realization, I know, but sometimes just saying it out makes it seem more important than just calling it a cliche!
So there it is. A blogpost that hasnt been thought through fully. Just written,as the thoughts came. I guess, its a little consistent, but at the same time, pretty disjointed in its messaging.

Now they blame us for eating too much

2008-05-21T09:05:00.002+05:30

Back in the days when Marvin Gaye sang
'Oh, mercy mercy me
Oh, things ain't what they used to be...'
people worried about radiation in the earth and oil wasted in the sea. But these days, even worries aren’t what they used to be...
People are becoming more and more stupid. Case in example, George W Bush. Ok, ok, everybody by now acknowledges that the leader of the free world has taken the concept of free speech to amusing levels. One wonders whether he has speech writers or whether there are a bunch of people who constantly bang their heads against the wall whenever the president says whatever he feels like... Most recently, Bush went on record to state that the food problem in the world is because we Indians are eating too much. Really, Mr. Bush?
Look, dude (referring to Mr. Dubya), you have no right to call us over eaters. Not from a country that’s fighting obesity as strongly as it is terrorism. Somalia, or some poor African country can. I won’t argue with them. But if you point out that the food crisis in America is because of India (or China), well, like the following article in TIME magazine says… “India to America: Eat Less, Fatties!”
It seems as if there's anything wrong with the world, it has to be due to something the 'third world countries' are doing. Its like with the time where they blamed us for all the pollution in the world. When the supposedly 'first world countries' were running their industries the skies, that was ok. Now our side of the world is trying to advance, and we have to be careful about not polluting the world?? Well, cough it up, u lazy obese slobs... Asia and the supposed 'third world countries' are here to stay, and we want our pound of flesh too...

I Love the World

2008-04-23T08:04:00.001+05:30

Here's something that's really nice. Its short, but it covers a lot of ground (pun intended)

Oil n Gold : How the Mallu story does unfold

2008-04-11T15:39:00.003+05:30

It seems the world is headed for a recession. The International Monetary Fund said so. And they did research to prove it. OH GREAT! Just when I was settling in, had invested a little money in the stock market and started to follow the indexes, it crashes. Ofcourse, until now, I didn't have any savings to make investments. As usual, I never win.

Ofcourse, at times like this, we should look to the good book to guide us. And in this case, the book has something that's the most hard hitting and relevant right on its back cover. It says … Dont Panic!

…Atleast not yet, I guess. But take your money out of the stock market, and put it in gold. As a mallu, I've seen the voracious appetite for gold that's prevalent in Kerala, but I never understood it. Maybe it has to do with the fact that most of the gold in India is found in the south… em…. 99% of it according to this article in the Hindu. (There's something I didn't know before). Or maybe its because, Kerala's got more women than men. Luckily gangsta rap isn't very hip in Kerala, otherwise we'd have more teenagers into bling! That'd have helped the gold industry… infact they shud probably consider creating a new segment than always harping on weddings and overachieving women.

Anyways… Now, it seems the average malayalee is much smarter than everybody else. We've been hoarding gold since god knows when. Atlast, we'll have our due… when the world collapses under the legacy of the imperialistic and war mongering dollar, the leftist state of kerala will snicker in satisfaction at having held on to their Marxian ideologies…

But wait a sec… So far this ideological state survived because the main ambition of every slightly smart and industrious mallu was to transport his heavily coconut-oiled self to the 'gelf', the oil-enriched big dollar ticket to offset lower earning potential in Kerala. By struggling, bribing and sometimes actually smuggling, he manages to reach the Promised Land and leave God's own country behind. He toils hard, and harbors dreams of accumulating wealth so that his brethren back in Kerala can…em… hoard more gold… Ofcourse with the descent of the dollar, the exchange rate is slowly becoming unfavorable. This has resulted in the inflow of NRI rupees becoming a trickle, and mallus being forced to re-assess their gulf strategy.

Oh how the gold rolex-ed, gold chain-ed, ray ban-ed, 'tang & nido laden' mighty have fallen…

Yet, malayalees are very good self-preservationists… they'll find their way back! I shud know, after all I am one… at heart atleast…

Quote of the day!

2008-03-26T13:24:00.001+05:30

Living in a vacuum sucks.
- Adrienne E. Gusoff

Why men drop while women shop!

2008-02-26T08:06:00.005+05:30

(continuing the thread on shopping...)
Considering my continual attempts to shop and having to visit multiple shops before I can get anything, I am a very experienced shopper and make for good shopping company. I cant buy anything anyway, so its always about the other person. But mainly, its because I've been house trained as shopping company since my childhood. Coming from a family, that had two women, and a father, I was usually... no, no make that, always... the male member who got to accompany the women on their shopping expeditions. As everybody knows, women are the true shopping exponents. They can spend oodles of time, running from shop to shop in search of the elusive color/design/price point. My mom and my sister encompass my true experience of the shopping domain. My mom used to be a pretty nifty shopper, and she would buy only what she really liked. Most people can be swayed into buying stuff based on suggestion and repeated exclamations of the awesomeness of the said product. But not my mom. She only bought what she really liked. My dad, on the other hand, found that, having an obedient son is an easy way to avoid the tedium of waiting for my mom to find something. So, shopping usually involved my mom and me getting dropped to a shopping area by my dad and then getting picked up after we’re done. It also saved my dad from getting rejected in his expert advise in buying stuff. Coz, like I said, my mom only buys what she likes.
Then there’s my sister. For her, shopping for clothes is like being in the army. Not in the formal, stark, starched uniform kind of way. But in the never-say-die, single minded focus and determination sort of way. Yes, my sister can claim to have scaled many peaks of endurance and staked claim to them. Most people would shrivel up and die by the time she finds something she likes. Most people I know have a breaking point. Between having to wear out a pair of jeans to tatters and having to buy a new one that’s not ‘THE ONE’, people would probably select the latter. Not my sister. There have been times, when I’ve been humbled by the enormous patience and restraint with which she shops. The last elusive search for a pair of jeans which met with my sister’s approval took about 6 months and a gajillion shops in 2 countries! But yes, now the world is at peace again. Until, the next time!
(In case u didnt get it, the title was supposed to be a play on the books by Allan & Barbara Pease, the ones that try to figure out men and women. They're really good, BTW)

Apparel shopping for the horizontally challenged!

2008-01-07T14:45:00.001+05:30

After repeated vain attempts at trying to buy clothes of my size in most retail establishments, I have become a very discerning shopper. I usually window shop and if I really like something, I have a covert process of size identification. I start with a study of the lay of the shop. With some casual glances, I can make out whether the store is truly customer friendly or is just out to make money.

One of the best ways to figure that out, is to see if sizes about 40 waist size are available. You see, capitalistic money minded business types will figure out the fact it is a waste of shelf space to place clothes of large sizes. The general trend I guess, is to figure out a bell curve of the demand of the sizes and then cut off the upper and lower ends, so as to maintain a constant demand
across SKUs. Bleeding buggers. Bleeding money minded buggers.

The good stores, the ones that feel they need to cater to all sizes of human beings and doesn’t discriminate against the lesser than Adonis shaped are to be praised, even if they might take a hit on inventory especially for the large sizes.

So, an initial analysis of the shop usually turns up the following info. Usually, they place pieces in ascending order of sizes. So, looking from the bottom up usually provides the best way to figure out the size availablilty. But it can also be possible for larger sizes not to be placed in the main rack as their demand is less. So, then I casually enquire about the available sizes to the nearest sales guy, making it appear like, its more out of curiosity than a immediate desire to buy it.

Another way of figuring out a good shop is the way the sales guys respond to you. In the Penny Pinchers United places, you can be sure that they would size u up and not waste too much time with you. But in the All Are Welcome establishments, the salespeople are more genuinely friendly and helping.

Then again even within the friendly and helping type of salespeople, there are different categories of helpful staff. Take two examples.

Me: (holding onto a amazing looking and rather largish pair of cargoes) So, these look like a new style for x brand, right? Are these comfortable?
Dull salesguy: Yes, sir. Very nice, very comfortable. John Abraham looked awesome in this in Goal. You want to try it on?
Me:(thinking) Goal? There are other people who were unfortunate enough to see that sad movie?
Me:(out loud) Oh no.. no.. I am just looking. So is this available in all sizes?
DS:all the way upto 36 sir.
Me:(thinking) All the way? What does he mean all the way when that’s just like 3 sizes? Its not even interesting. Boring cargoes.. who wears them anyway?
Me:(out loud) oh! Wow! I’ll come back later. Thanks

On the other hand, a smarter salesguy might be a little bit more enterprising

Me: (desperately wishing this pair of amazing trousers would fit) What all sizes do u have of these trousers?
Smarter sales guy: Sir, these don’t have extra large sizes. What we can do, is take thelargest size, and increase the width by about two inches. Why don’t u try this on, and see how much difference is there?
Me: heh,..heh… no, no I am just browsing. Maybe I’ll come back later. But how much is it?
SSG: Only the cost of an arm and a leg.
Me: Only? Wow! Let me try it on then!
Me: (struggling to fit into it inside the fitting room) Damn this infernal metabolism. I wish I was like those guys who eat everything and don’t gain weight….
Me: (outside the fitting room) No, this doesn’t feel correct. Also, I bought two pants last week. I was just trying it out. Thanks, man!
SSG: Sir, we can increase the width if u want.
Me: No, No.. its not that. I didn’t like the fit at all…
SSG: Ok sir… we also have some track pants which are very elastic if u like.
Me: (Thinking) Next he’ll be telling me he’s got good maternity wear....

And after all this, the joy of actually being able to get a piece that fits in really amazing. Of course the joy is usually short lived and the remaining desperate times of unavailability are usually characterized by a desire to just get stuff stiched!

Right back at ya, US

2007-11-22T12:30:00.000+05:30

Who are the real illegal immigrants in US? :-)

He he he

2007-11-15T17:19:00.001+05:30

Some years ago...
Santa: Ho! Ho! Ho!
Woman: Awww...its Santa! So sweet...

Now in Australia....
Santa: Ho! Ho! Ho!
Woman: How dare u! ~one tight slap~

Even Santa's got to be Politically Correct (PC) this year, atleast in Australia. He cant use the word 'Ho' as a greeting any more. Why? Coz, in the crazy mixed up world which is ruled by whatever happens in the US of A, Ho is slang for a prostitute... and u don't want Santa pointing his finger at a girl and going Ho Ho Ho, do u? That too, at a little girl at an impressionable age of six or seven. Who, by the way, should not know the meaning of the slang anyway. But ya, some kids at 12 or 13 would probably snicker at hearing Santa say Ho... over and over again. Kids above the age of 15 wouldn't probably care at all.
But heck, Santa cant say Ho... It might insult adult women in Australia. Australia? Where they've got a bordello on the stock exchange? What's wrong with being called a Ho?
But when u come to think of it, it does change how u look at a lot of other things...
I wonder, how people can keep a straight face now when they go to Ho Chi Minh City... and does that mean Westward Ho is really about prostitutes in the old west? Oh wait. That was what Unforgiven was.
There was even a Westward Ho hotel which is now defunct. Wonder if it was the name that got to it. If this had been in any other country other than US, this might have happened...

Some cocky American (why are they always so cocky?) walks into the WHH and sashays (who sashays these days?) over to the reception...
Cocky American: So is this where the Westward Ho is?
Bored receptionist: ~yawn~ What do u think?
CA: Dont give me any attitude, scum. I got lots of it myself.
BR: ~yawn~ u want a room?
CA: Yes. and ur best Ho.
BR: Excuse me?
CA: Send me one of ur Hos...
BR: u want a hose?
CA: No...Ho! Ho! Ho! u numbskull...
BR: Oh! Merry christmas to u too...we'll send up our hotel Santa to ur room...
CA: What BS. I am leaving...

If u dont believe me, about the Santa thing.. here's the link

Quote of the day

2007-10-31T11:38:00.001+05:30

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
Redd Foxx
US comedian (1922 - 1991)

Life - in a few short words

2007-10-25T19:29:00.001+05:30

There are times when I wonder.. I wonder about life? I wonder why I keep doing what I am doing? Am I happy? Is this all worth it? Why did Vidya Balan do Heyy Baby? Albus Dumbledore is gay?? I guess I get confused a lot and the only thing I have been able to figure out that the choices we make, define our life... *Sigh*...

But ever so often, there are some moments of clarity, when, viewing life in its entirety, its not as bad as I usually think it to be. The silver lining. But I think that's because of the booze... You know, the world will be a much better place with more drunk people. There might be a lot of drunken revelry and slurred speeches, but then everybody's happy, right? So, there'll be a hell of a mess to clean up, but everybody's.... happy?

Anyway, getting back to life... wait, no, it should be coming back to life...

Describing life is difficult, or even summarizing it in a few words is quite tough. Interestingly, there are people who have been able to do it in such a way, that it all makes sense. Without further explanation, I'll defer to wrecktangle who's summarized life quite succinctly...

"....Life –

Some friends.
Some alcohol.
Some music.
Some books.
Some movies.
Some things stay the same. Thank god for that."

There's more in that post and its really good. Link to the entire post.

Ridin down the thoroughfare...

2007-10-17T23:12:00.002+05:30

Cars whizzing by like crazy
in a bleary-eyed blur of reality
The roar of the engine
drowns the exhilarated silence
The rush of air around
subdues the breathless excitement
Whizzing past the standing-still
catching up with eternity...

Was aiming for a haiku but got carried away :-)

Let Sleeping Buddhas Lie

2007-10-01T11:05:00.000+05:30

I tried to read Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance... like three times. Every time I would start it off, after a certain while, I would just lose interest. Maybe it wasn't racy enough for my taste, or too deep that I couldn't take it anymore. I guess it depends on your mood when you can handle some deep introspection into the metaphysical nature of life or when all you are looking for is just sex...oops, I mean entertainment. Disastrous as it is, usually, my attempts at soul searching have always resulted in a lot of confused writing. But sometimes, if the topic is something that's really close to my heart, I end up with a little interesting piece of prose. Similar to the following...

Sleep.

A state of rest.
A feeling of complete relaxation.

Rejuvenation of the body and the soul.

Very addictive. So much that mornings become a pain.

Better in winters when you are under a blanket. When you slip your leg out from underneath the warmth and feel the cold and then snuggle back in. When you can feel the muscles in your body relax and feel like you never want to get up. Ever.

Horrible without air conditioning in summer. Sweat soaked and sticky. Smelly. You turn and turn hoping to get into some position where despite the heat, you might get some sleep.

Difficult in cramped spaces, hard mattresses, and without a pillow.
Difficult to, in planes, trains, cars and buses.

The best part of sleep is that its personal. Its only for me. My sleep is for me alone. I need to sleep. I cant give u my sleep, and neither can u have some of mine. But yawning, that's communal. Your yawn ends up setting off everybody...

Dozing off... One of those "hold-your-pee-until-u-burst" sort of situations, when trying to stay awake during some tedious class or conversation, you suddenly nod off. There's this small period of release where you are semi-conscious and you feel amazing. Then your head moves down and u wake up involuntarily. And you wish you could just doze off, right there.

Memories of good sleep makes u want to go back to sleep. The way you can snuggle up and feel so cozy that thinking of it makes me sleepy.

How, even when your day has been totally crappy, the thought that you can now close your eyes, and despite how hectic/panicky/life threatening the next day might be, you'll feel relaxed for a while.

How, when you have been keeping yourself awake for a really long time, your eyes become droopy and suddenly u feel like they r just too heavy to keep open.

Waking up, and realising it was just a dream...

Waking up, and realising its time to get up...

Sleep...

Astrological Nuisance

2007-08-27T13:05:00.001+05:30

In continuation from my previous post where I had gone home for the weekend...

But anyway, this isnt about my deep rooted lack of self esteem. Its more of an observation on culture at large. Because on this trip home, I met, for the first time, with a sooth-sayer. Ya, ok, so he's an astrologer, but isnt that what they all are? Nostradamuses who foretell your personal future with just date of birth and time of birth as inputs. Oracles who move around some little shells over a square board, placing them at random and then listing out what u can and cannot achieve in your lifetime. The same people who sent those 300 horome crazies from Sparta with wash-board abs to their doom... Or the weird looking guy who sent Bill and Ted on their excellent adventure (but ofcourse, he was from the future). For me, he was a rather paunchy 50 year old with black wire-frame glasses and some sandal-wood paste smeared on his forehead. He also was a certified astrologer - A certificate from the All India Astrologers association was prominently displayed on the wall behind his desk. It showed that he had passed the astrology exam in flying colors. I wondered about the exam. I wondred if he probably had foreseen the questions beforehand, or maybe the examiner had given him a blank paper and asked him to write down the questions which they wanted to ask!!
Anyway, My visit was pretty much just a courtesy because my parents had got some work done by the guy and wanted me to settle accounts. But the dude was so wound up, that the moment he got me, he.. 'unleashed hell' - to quote maximus. The offensive was pretty strong and it lasted about 2 hours during which he sought to shake me up.. metaphysically speaking. He fired off 'to do' lists like an assault rifle at 500 rounds per minute. He rambled on about life and its meaning and how people ought to live it. He talked about everything under the sun. About prayer, and visiting temples and understanding god. To top it all, he also gave me free sex advice. "Dont watch porn", he said. "That's not real." (You got that right buddy...). "Nobody can be that big", he said. "At least not in India." (Really? That sure is informative!) "Dont do it from behind." What??? Hang on dude... That sure is like the most irrelevant and so-not-what-I-want-hear advise ever. All I am currently aiming not to be, is that 40 yr old virgin type. So right now, my only area of interest is in getting some. Period. Once I am over that hurdle, I'll worry about my technique... Wat the hell?
There were many other myraid points which he made after that but I was lost in the thought that this was taking too long and there were other relatives I needed to impress with my lack of social skills! I think he noticed when my eyes glazed over, after about an hour of me not listening, and quickly wound up the session. He also gave me some quickies about what phase of life I was in currently, and how the alignment of the stars was ruining my social scene. I nodded wisely deep in the thought that, finally he was right. You know its hopeless when the entire universe is conspiring against you...
After this, he took the money and let me leave. Phew.. that was something I dont want to go through again.

Social ineptitude

2007-08-27T12:38:00.003+05:30

I went home last weekend. It was one of my bi-monthly trips in my role as 'the caretaker'. I go to a home which is empty (of people, not stuff) and get the local help to clean up the place. I also take out the family car, like an animal that had been leashed for the past two months, and give it a run around so that it doesn't get... rusted? Whatever. I thought these trips would be good for me. More time for myself, and also to keep in touch with the extended family. But somehow, I don't seem to identify much with there, at least, not as much as I want to.
The usual modus operandi in these visits is I check out the house, and I do some bank related activities. Post these, I also meet the relatives. Its usually perfunctory meet and greet sessions timed (by me) to last 15-30 minutes before departing with some vague apology about having to clean the house or meet other people. Its not that I don't care about them, but its that I am usually at a loss for words in such social circumstances. My main failing I think in my ambition to be a smooth talking, wise cracking, all knowing sort of guy is that I don't talk much. I think I am better on the all knowing part. Anyway,I think the main failing on my part is my inability to associate with the regular banter of such meetings. This has to do with the following general concept I think is valid in such scenarios. The key ingredient to maintaining good ties in the family circle is knowing what each relative is doing. But this is where I come across as a dud. I just don't remember where my father's brother's wife's third cousin is these days or which uncle's second son got married or any of that stuff. So, mostly, whenever my loquacious relatives try to stir me into conversation by mentioning these people who I cant for the life of me remember... I smile and nod vigorously hoping that was the intended acknowledgment. It usually back fires, coz then they clam up and give knowing looks to each other like I did something cardinally wrong. Gosh, its hard! I never know when I might have accidentally done something which is not part of the social etiquette, and I keep worrying about it. My inability to shine in such social circumstances usually compounds my despair about my rather Neanderthal-like social skills with the rest of the world. "I Anand, I like this only... u like? No? Ok. Boink!".

Cynical Goat-ism

2007-08-04T21:17:00.000+05:30

I am a cynic. I look at the world through the tinted glasses of a cynic. And it looks pretty blue to me. People don't like cynics coz cynics make fun of stupid people. They act all high and mighty and look like they know everything. To be honest, a cynic generally does. :-)

Being a cynic is actually easy. You put on a frown, or a general smirk on your face, and criticize everything. And in doing so, cynics generally irritate people. Its not intentional, but it happens. Mostly because cynics tend to blame everybody else for what's wrong with the world, while they themselves don't do anything to improve the situation. True. But its not easy being a cynic if you are stupid. The light's gotta be on upstairs for being a cynic coz or else u've got be like Forrest Gump.... 'Run Forrest, Run!"

Cynics are the irritating buggers in the movies who'll constantly ridicule the choices the hero makes, or the inspiring rhetoric he makes, and obviously get killed/eaten/turned into a zombie at some point in the movie. This obviously allows our hero to cry out in anguish, "Why him/her? Why not me instead?", thus establishing his dashing persona and his penchant for self-sacrifice. Bah! Humbug!

In my opinion, being a cynic is more of a choice of self-preservation, forget self-sacrifice. Life is full of low lifes who'll fleece the lint out of your smelly sock if they could and trust me when i say, trust is truly overrated these days.

There are certain things that really get my goat, cynical goat that is.

1.) Shit happens and it generally happens to you - No matter how many ways I look at this, I can never understand/explain how this happens.

2.) Only the beautiful survive - Andrew Grove was wrong. It ain't the paranoid. Its the good looking. If you look good, then you're half way there. Ugly people have to do so much more to get to the same level as good looking people. In fact, some times, its just better to not try.

3.) Talk the talk and you dont need to walk the walk - Oh yes... forget about actually having to workif you can "power shmooze" your way through life. Networking is all that's required these days, and I dont mean the orkut kind. Not only does it boost your career, it helps you get the women too. Woe betide the tongue tied...

4.) Taste is directly proportional to waist - Whatever tastes good, adds to your waist. And more the taste, the less proportional your waist will be!

5.) There's no absolute - I dont mean the vodka (because then i would say, there's never enough Absolut!). I mean, in general things are always grey and life is never black or white. This can sometimes be a good thing, but making decisions becomes infinitely more harder.

There's always more things in life to complain about and I guess this would end up being a pretty big post. But I wanted to start off on my metaphysical ranting. Now, I can come back later and pick up from where I left off. There'll be more posts on the Cynical Goat... But this one's over. And it doesnt have a link at the end!

The End of the World as We Know It

2007-07-16T14:19:00.000+05:30

Ok, so maybe the title was a little too drastic, but according to scientists, the Comet Swift-Tuttle is going to hit the earth soon. And that too, on my birthday. The date is Aug. 14, 2126.
I would be 146. Who knows?
In the words of REM, "Its the end of the world as we know it... and I feel fine!"

Single and Loving it

2007-06-08T13:44:00.001+05:30

When you are single, shy and as orkut calls it "mirror-shattering material", the social scene on weekends are mostly limited. In my case, in addition to my having a dull social life, most of my friends are also single and have pretty much nothing to do as well. The old adage about the birds flocking comes to mind. So, our choices for cool activities to do, are usually limited to either watching a movie, going to Spencers/any other local mall or generally chilling out at home (read: sleep like a log or get drunk and pass out) .
It usually happens that as the weekend rolls around, we always make plans to go where the "chicks" are, or where the "scenery" is interesting. And we do end up in these places, all dressed up, looking like the single-and-ready-to-mingle cool dudes that we are. The teetotalers munch on the free eats while the rest order the cheap beer. Post initial grubbing session, and sufficient loosening of the tongue by inebriation, everybody concentrates on checking out the crowd. Categories are decided, and nicknames get created. "Check out that pinktop, in the corner. She's hot da, and she keeps looking this side!" " Ya, I'd give her a 7. But look at what's attached to her arm. What does she see in him?"... and so on and so forth. Talk then moves onto the latest gossip about who's doing who where and who saw them together and what the heck is wrong with them for doing the previously mentioned who. In between, somebody, slightly less sober might attempt to revel everybody with topics, totally unrelated but usually another round of drinks would get that guy to shut up and let the gossip continue. The only topic that might actually evoke enough attention other than the current real-life soaps, is who's shifting to which company and how much more money they are going to make. This would lead to further discussions on how cruel the world is and how, some people are just too lucky/talk their way into getting what they want. Being the sort of guy who is sufficiently intoxicated before being able to actually tolerate these conversations, I tend to remember very little the next day.
Many weekends, the prospect of having those conversations itself was enough for us to ditch the idea of going out and just chilling at home. Unfortunately, chilling at home also tends to end up having these conversations anyway, the only difference being, the evening is a whole lot cheaper.
I dont regret any of these times, coz, without them, I'd probably be doing something totally productive and enriching like learning a musical instrument, helping the elderly or even god forbid, working out. But the soul enriching times I spend with my single friends, doing the "cool" single stuff, will surely last me with great memories for all the future life ahead when I wont be single and wishing I was! Maybe then, I'd think of taking up all those productive and enriching stuff which I mentioned before!!

Thought sourcing

2007-06-07T15:29:00.000+05:30

I am not a major news reader. Yes, I like RSS feeds but its not largely to do with news. But on the odd occasion I check the world at large, I get the feeling America is obsessed with two things. Osama and Outsourcing. Osama's the general metaphor for terrorism and ever since 9/11, he's been around everywhere and his henchmen/lackeys/assorted heinous deputies have been troubling the world no end. Its daily news, usually very sad, and pretty repetitive, so I'd rather not discuss it right now.
On the other hand, outsourcing, that supposed manna of business re-engineering and cost control, has also evoked the interest of most Americans and you can be sure everybody's got an opinion on it. I think outsourcing is cool, not because I give a rodent's behind that America can finally figure out where Asia is on the map, but because it provides a huge potential to make money. Yet, despite this initial euphoria about the monetary gains from IT outsourcing, its quite obvious its not going to grow at such a tremendous rate for very long, and the cost arbitrage which everybody's been harping about, is probably going to disappear at some point in the future. People have gone to great lengths to assure everybody that right now, there's just so much to throw around, and so life's going to be good for a while at least. Yippee!!
So, everybody's happy now, and young people in India study, work hard and get a "campus placement" into a software company that recruits only the cream of the class. To do what?? Maintenance work on some 100 year old code that runs on obsolete hardware which cant be replaced, or sit on the metaphorical bench and wait for a moment to go "on site" and rake in the moolah.
In some recent articles by some of the supposed visionaries of the IT revolution, there has been talks of how the IT companies should move towards intellectual arbitrage, as the cost arbitrage advantage is not sustainable. IMHO, there is very little that separates one Indian IT company from the other. Catchy titles like Global Delivery Model, Offshore Development Center, Center of Excellence etc just give rise to cool acronyms like GDM, ODC and CoE, and are quoted ad nauseum, but is that enough for sustainable profit growth? And if so, for how long? Yes, alright, I concede that, considering the sheer volume of available work, it seems the party's going to last for a while longer.
Moving on from my rant (I work in one of these companies!), one of the positive points, I guess, of outsourcing, has been how entrepreneurs in certain countries (like India) have been able to capitalize on it. And in the process, create jobs which in turn leads to a growing economy, and so on and so forth. Most companies in developed countries, nowadays have an India strategy which, I guess, over the years will probably become an Asia/East Europe/Latin America strategy considering the Global Delivery Model (GDM) encompasses all low wage area as potential for an ODC. Even the markets respond positively to companies who outsource, as it seems to be the one of the popular strategies to cut costs in a "globalised", "highly competitive" and "constantly evolving" economy.
The media, too have had their fill of debating the positives and negatives of outsourcing, and reams of print have been wasted in efforts to either justify or condemn it. There have even been articles that have joked about outsourcing.

But recently, I came across one that sort of mocked the entire thought process behind outsourcing and how its not a strategy that can be blindly applied in any industry. In particular, the article talks of how its not possible to do outsourcing where the social context cannot be understood by the people who the work have been outsourced to, and thus it leads to a really hilarious situation. Although, it makes fun of the Indian parliament (of which I am not a big fan anyway), I still felt it was interesting enough to warrant a link. So here it is.

Meth Marathon

2007-05-03T20:07:00.000+05:30

Back in the 1960s, getting high wasn't about climbing the local hill, but something u did by breathing in. The world was a happier place and a lot of people got lucky without having to work hard or look good! Damn, those hippies! This post isnt about the Swinging sixties, but about the rather large scale use of intoxicants that happened then. Ofcourse things have changed over the last couple of decades. Recreational drug usage, is nowadays always immediately associated with abuse and hence gets categorized under dangerous and potentially harmful. I don't advocate it, but I am not against the whole 'getting high' business. I think people, who can handle it, and enjoy it without ending up abusing the substance, should do it.
So, when I came across this article which gives an account of a bunch of well heeled, social drug users and 72 hours in their life while they were riding the white lightning (or something of a similar nature called meth) , it was interesting enough to warrant a post. They close themselves off and take off to mental pleasures unheard of. Its quite a marathon drug use session and the article is just as long too! Interestingly, crystal meth, their poison of choice, has many websites like this dedicated to telling you how bad it is. Well, whatever! Those guys had fun.

Losing weight the sweat free way

2007-04-30T12:28:00.000+05:30

Never in my life have I ever felt a profound and deep respect for the scientific community than when I read today that they had developed what is probably, the most significant achievement in the history of science since the television. A cure for obesity which does not involve moving a muscle. According to this BBC report, US scientists have devised a drug that can switch on a gene to burn body fat, offering hope of an exercise pill. They've tried it on mice, and those mice are losing weight alright! If they get down to human trials, I would definitely want to volunteer...
This one's going to be one hell of a best seller in the life style drug category. It would be bigger than viagra even!!

Is it ingenuity or just plain stupidity?

2007-04-18T14:04:00.000+05:30

Lets stop talking about human ingenuity. Ya, so there are a lot of smart people out there. And these people make sure that the remaining bunch feel really stupid about themselves. But stupidity is also an amazing thing. Other people's stupidity especially. Right from the guy who first looked into the wrong end of gun to see what would happen to the people who walk around thinking that UFOs will take them to a better place, they have kept mankind entertained for centuries, and still continue to do so. Its always very comforting to pick up the newspaper and read about how somebody would slash their wrist before their supposed lover's wedding hall, just to prove a point. Ofcourse, the irony in the situation where the aforementioned dejected lover got arrested for trying to commit suicide just had me laughing in splits.
So, it grieves me no less that human stupidity can also be used as an excuse. An article in Wired deals with how immediately after the Virginia Tech incident, people had started registering domain names like vamassacre.com and selling them on ebay. When one of the guys who registered these domain names was asked as to why he would do such a thoughtless and heinous act, his reply was and I quote, from the article, "I didn't think it through. I was just thinking about the money first." Wow! Duh!
This isnt an isolated phenomenon. People had the foresight to find out which were the expected hurricanes for 2006 and then register the domain names in advance, so that they wouldnt miss out on the "gold rush" afterwards. Who cares about human compassion, when u're trying to make a quick buck?
It brings me back to my initial statement. Human ingenuity is cool! And so is stupidity! It makes for great reading.

Weathering the storm

2007-04-09T14:11:00.000+05:30

"If patience is worth anything, it must endure to the end of time. And a living faith will last in the midst of the blackest storm. "
- Mohandas K Gandhi

More amazing storm photos

I am all for reservation...

2007-04-08T19:36:00.000+05:30

The railway ticket kind, the crappy low cost airline kind, and yes, the really cool movie ticket booking kind... But not for the education system.

It was Aristotle who said that "The only stable state is the one in which all men are equal before the law." But in India it seems, this is not the case. Politicians, in order to stir up vote banks, have been flaying the reservation issue ad nauseum. Its had unbelievable repercussions so far, and everybody who's anybody has an opinion on the issue.
Its highly controversial. My stand on it is pretty clear. I am against reservation. I am against reservation for post graduate programs, and private sector jobs. I am against somebody who's already made use of the reservation system to gain a seat in a graduation program, and then use the same excuse to get into a post graduate program and then get a private sector job. How much further will it go? Will appraisals and promotions in organisations be decided on reservation as well? Will children of people who have already benefited by reservation get the same benefits again?
It was really heartening to see the media and the general public rally together against such atrocity. In keeping with ensuring that the anti reservation message is propogated as far as possible, the following site gives people full access to all details.

Antireservation.org

Check out the wiki... Make up your mind, and support the cause. Its worth fighting for.

Shit happens.... and its got a website too

2007-04-08T19:10:00.000+05:30

Sometimes, there's more to life than just weird and interesting stuff to read. I mean how many silly things are there on the net? I mean its all right to want to learn how to feed pigeons or even learn how to make houses from matchsticks, but you never truly understood the sheer availability of useless information on the net unless you come across a site like Poop Report. Yes, its true, shit happens, and they're there to make sure that it gets reported.

Read on at

"The Intellectual Appreciation of Poop Humor PoopReport.com"

Die, Die, my darling

2007-04-08T18:52:00.000+05:30

I guess one's mortality is never as such a concern until one is truly made aware of it. People go about their life aspiring, dreaming, scheming and in general living with the general idea that there's something to look forward to. But there's always some moment in everybody's life, even for a few seconds, that they are confronted by the sheer fragility of it. That one point of time, when suddenly clarity hits you like a brick wall, and your thoughts explode in your head wondering how and why and what, and you think... thank god I have life insurance??

What would be a person's last thought before he dies? well, if you are one of the following people, I doubt they actually thought they were going to die...

30 Strangest Deaths in History

An anthology of expiry dates

2007-03-27T14:20:00.000+05:30

In today's Information-I-always-craved-for-but-never-found-till-now section, I came across this web page which has a detailed list of expiry dates for most household items, and then some.
If you ever wanted to know how long you could keep that old bottle of face lotion around after it had been opened, dont fret. This page will tell you all that and more.

The site is appropriately titled "Organize Your Life".

Insurance for ticketless travel

2007-03-27T13:45:00.000+05:30

Mumbai is probably one of the most interesting cities to live in these days. Right from natural disasters, to random acts of terrorism, the city has seen it all. Life in Mumbai is fast, furious and very crowded. Just like its local trains. Everyday, these trains traverse hundreds of miles, overflowing with humanity, most of whom are driven by the tedious, yet natural need to exist. Survival of the fittest.
Sometimes, being the fittest, is not a matter of physical ability but mental dexterity. I came across this blog entry which was referenced by the freakonomics blog of how some people have formed an organisation for assisting people who travel ticketless in the local trains and get caught! This system infact promotes the violation!
This goes to prove that in India, the general belief is that if there is a rule, it can be circumvented! Its antiestablishmentarianism at its best!

(Image from Hindu Business Line)

How to Cheat the Mumbai Train System

"....However, when there is DRM, there is piracy. Because supply reaches to demand (and not vice-versa). This happened in this case also.
Some very intelligent traveller (and in Mumbai everybody is a local train traveller), came up with this brilliant idea. What he did defied this model of random checks."....

Reading between the bubbles

2007-03-22T22:26:00.000+05:30

I love comics. They provide a visceral entertainment which is comparable to watching movies. The comics are a medium where the text is as important as the visual representation of the scene. This gives rise to a lot of possibilities as to how comics can be made. Where initially it was considered a childish preoccupation, comic books in the form of graphic novels are for mature audiences and are indeed quite graphic in detail and visual themes. I think this is an art form that'll probably take on a whole new dimension, if its taken to the web and presented as an interactive graphic novel. I mean videos are cool, but despite all efforts, people never really look as good as they do in comic books! With the latest trend of trying to create movies out of graphic novels like Sin City,300, Batman Begins (supposedly based on graphic novels Batman: The Man Who Falls, Batman: The Long Halloween and others) , and the multitude of super hero movies, it only seems natural that the future bodes well for comic books!
On a separate note of interest, comics of Indian origin (before it used to be Indian comic books, but now they're made in US by Virgin Comics, hence, the comics of Indian orgin tag!) like Devi, and 'The Sadhu' are interesting as concepts, but it remains to be seen how far they are able to amalgamate Indian mythos with modern sensibilities of comic books.

In the link for today, its comic book double entendre at its best. Infact, they have taken it out of context to create the effect. But its fun!! Check out...

Top 15 Unintentionally Funny Comic Book Panels

Quotable quote for the day

2007-03-21T13:58:00.000+05:30

"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy,the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named Bush, Dick, and Colon. "
--Comedian Chris Rock

As quoted on Rense.com

High school fusion

2007-03-20T13:15:00.000+05:30

When I was in high school, or as we in India like to refer to it - the period between 8th to 10th grade - I liked physics and maths. Yeah, so I was a nerd. For most nerds, a scientific project is probably a huge achievement. For me though, I wasnt so interested in the whole project thing, because I was a lazy nerd! Anyway, the maximum I came up with was a working trip alarm. If you tripped the wire, the alarm would go off. That was the height of my technical achievements. Pause to dig my nose and look goofy.

But kids these days are doing stuff I couldnt even imagine doing. Here's a sample of a kid who in high school (In US, it covers the entire set of grades from 8th to 12th), created his own fusion reactor. Nuclear fusion reactor. Out of regular household parts. Now,I am enough of a geek to know how difficult it is, for full blown scientists to set up one of these things. With complex planning and equipment which would require some level of security clearances and hell of a lot of raised eyebrows in any country.

Must do wonders for his social life.
Bully #1: "Hey, isn't he the nerd who built that thing which was in the news?"
Fellow antagonizer: "Yeah, he thinks he's real smart. Lets beat him up..."

High school student builds fusion reactor

High school student Thiago Olson has gone beyond basic physics class. Way beyond. Using parts and materials scrounged from the local hardware story and eBay, Olson built a working fusion reactor... (Link)

Pavan sees stars!!

2007-03-18T23:54:00.000+05:30

I'll let the photo do the talking. Pavan, met his favorite actress and as you can make out from the smile, he was feeling quite peachy after that. Happy man, him! For those not in the know, she is actress Nayanthara, looking quite nice, if I might say so. The location is Mochas, Chennai... and according to the maitre d', "Oh! She comes here quite often.". How droll, darling!

Googling your way to jail

2007-03-18T01:40:00.001+05:30

You know the world has changed when what you do online is used as evidence against you in court. Its a scary thought, considering everbody crying hoarse about preserving the anonymity.

In a bizzare turn of events, a wife who had googled 'how to commit murder' has her search results used against her as evidence for the murder of her husband.

Yikes! Talk about giving google-whacked a whole new meaning. It returned just one result. Guilty.

Cop: Wife googled 'How to commit murder'

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

At exactly 5:45:34 on April 18, 2004 a computer taken from the office of the attorney of Melanie McGuire, did a search on the words "How To Commit Murder."

That same day searches on Google and MSN search engines, were conducted on such topics as `instant poisons,` `undetectable poisons,' 'fatal digoxin doses,' and gun laws in New Jersey and Pennsylvania. (Link)

Who does drive better?

2007-03-15T23:57:00.000+05:30

Some people run, others climb. Some like to sleep, others like to watch TV. I find driving very soothing. Driving and music. Its a great combination. Get out onto the open road, play some great music, and its an amazing relaxation. Over the last couple of years, the quality of roads in various cities in South India have become better, and long distance driving is not as much of a pain as before. Yet, there are a lot of obstacles to an enjoyable drive. Pedestrians, animals and bad drivers would form the main chunk of the problem. Pedestrians and animals are, unfortunately, in India atleast, beyond one's control. Bad driving, though, is something that can be curbed by laying out better guidelines for driving on roads. What we need with bigger, and better roads, is stuff like laying out lane rules and certain amount of road etiquette.

I had actually posted earlier about how I felt men make better drivers than women. I'll just leave that comment in like that rather than explain in detail. I stand by my statement. I still think they are bad at it... and so proves some of the videos in the next link. Its from a blog called "One Man's Blog" and its a list of the

10 Worst Drivers Ever Caught on Video

Go ahead... take a look. Atleast some of them are really hilarious. Even if u dont agree with me. (Link)

Real-(sh)ity TV

2007-03-13T09:11:00.000+05:30

A recent survey in USA noted that 30% of Americans would like to be on a reality show, and the remaining 70% already have. Well, nobody did that survey, but watching TV these days, one gets the feeling that pretty much everybody in America are either stranded on an island, pretty bad at singing, racing down some highway with cops behind them, eating weird bugs for money or generally having their most candid moments played back to the entire world. Now, I am sure there are some real good reality programs, but most of them lack original content other than for your regular Joe being as irregular as possible.
The thing that really irritates me is that most of Indian TV feels it is entertainment to either show these sad American or British tv shows to Indian audiences or even worse, copy them and Indianize them.

A recent article I came across, courtesy the freakonomics blog, is a hilarious take on these programs. Its a news article reporting a new reality show to air soon...

University of Chicago to Pick Next Economist by Reality TV
The University of Chicago, known for its free-market approach to economics, today announced that it will select its next tenured faculty member in the "the dismal science" through a reality TV competition modelled on shows such as "Survivor" and VH1's "The (White) Rapper Show".
(Link)

Resilience

2007-03-09T11:12:00.000+05:30

photo (C) bruno mercier

“He whose wisdom exceeds his works, to what may he be likened? To a tree whose branches are numerous but whose roots are few. The wind comes along and uproots it and sweeps it down.”
From the Talmund

That was the profound part of this post. Now then, in real life,

If you got the grounding,
then your brain's got the founding,
But people gonna be hounding,
coz they think u need a pounding!

Trivial pursuits - I

2007-03-08T16:55:00.000+05:30

Came across some stupid trivia in this site I visited. It said

"When Albert Einstein died, his final words died with him. The nurse at his side didn't understand German"

I wonder if he was trying to tell her that she was stepping on his oxygen tube...you know.. something like
"bitte Schritt weg von meinem Sauerstoffschlauch.. bitte..bitte...".

More useless trivia at... Human World

Sleep Well, Naked

2007-03-08T16:51:00.000+05:30

Sleeping in the nude? well, New research says its healthy.
New research??? Who does these things?
SleepNaked.org does.

Here are the results of one of their studies

On average, 39 of the 45 participants agreed every morning that they found it easier to fall asleep during week two of the study in comparison to week one.
The sleep professional examining the video footage determined that 34 of the 45 participants seemed to be sleeping more restfully during week two of the study in comparison to week one. It is known that sleeping more restfully allows the body to regenerate and repair itself more effectively, so health benefits could also be suggested as a result of sleeping naked. (Ya right!)
On average, 38 of the 45 participants agreed that they felt they had more energy upon waking in week two of the study, although many noted that it was hard to determine their level of alertness in a conclusive manner.

Who says research isnt fun?

No man is an island and all that stuff

2007-03-08T10:52:00.000+05:30

Tom Hanks proved that the highlight of being shipwrecked on a deserted island is being able to lose an intellectual argument with a volleyball and throw it away in disgust.
Sometimes, in life, you wish you atleast had that volleyball. Loneliness isnt just about not having anybody around but not being able to associate yourself with those around you. I think the following cartoon strip highlights a certain feeling of unwantedness which precedes loneliness. Its probably not sad in the existential sense, but I wanted to set the context. (Link)

Real life C&H Snow Art

2007-03-07T19:41:00.000+05:30

With a sprinkling of wit, satire, philosophy, and great drawing, Calvin & Hobbes was and is probably THE best comic strip I've ever read. I have always wanted an official (!) Stupendous Man t-shirt, but apparently Bill Watterson , the guy who drew C&H, doesnt believe in merchandising... (irrelevant trivia, but hey I bought and read the 10th anniversary edition)

(Image taken from here)

Anyway, getting back to the site I wanted to recommend.. Calvin had an amazingly twisted imagination and this was reflected in the most awesome snowman art he used to do. It would have taken quite an effort to realise that art in real life, but somebody's actually gone and done it.

Follow the link for some weird photos and the corresponding Calvin art. (Link)

Calvin and Hobbes Snowmen in Real Life

Desktop Tower Defender!!

2007-03-07T16:51:00.000+05:30

Absolutely engaging flash game. Spent lots of time trying to build the optimum defence strategy!!
Try it out...

Desktop Tower Defense

A live action puzzle game written for fun in flash. You have to stop your enemies, or 'creeps', from travelling all the way across the screen. Tower pieces can be purchased and placed on the map to kill the creeps before they make it across. Inspired by a Warcraft 3 tower defense map called Autumn Crossing and a few other TD Warcraft III maps. (Link)

Wannabe lazy blogger

2007-03-07T16:09:00.000+05:30

Blog started.
Will post stupid/interesting stuff found on net.
Was mailing everybody.
Instead, now will post.
Comments anyone?